Understanding Relationships

Relationships were created by our heavenly father and are therefore very important. Genesis 2:18 reads and “the Lord God said, it is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him”. A stable and healthy relationship with a partner, family, and friends was always part of God’s plan for us. Having close relationships are all about building each other up and supporting one another. God has promised to never leave us nor forsake us. So, he will be with us during our mountain tops experiences as well as through our valleys. Having healthy relationships can influence and promote good health and positive self-esteem. We all desire to have a sense of connection and belonging. However, we must always remember to keep God at the center of all of our relationships. Matthew 6:33 says “but seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you”. Our relationship with God is the most important relationship in our lives.

Putting God first is integral for the success we will experience in all of our relationships. John 15: 7-8 says “if ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you. Herein is my father glorified, that ye bear much fruit; so shall ye be my disciples. Without God in our lives, we can’t bear much fruit. So, if we want to live an abundant and blessed life, we must learn to trust God and his promises for our lives.

Understanding Relationships and its Healthy Elements

Understanding relationships from God’s perspective is vital if you want to make sure that you will end up with a healthy and emotionally fulfilling one. 2 Corinthians 6:14 says “do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness”? Proverbs 13:20 reads, “he who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools suffers harm”. Focusing on what God says about the healthy elements of relationships is vital for you to learn and understand.

The healthy elements of good relationships are as follows:

  • Communication

Communication is the key in all of our relationships and is essential for enjoying healthy and happy relationships. We are given two ears and one mouth for a reason. We need to learn to listen more and speak less. In Stephen Covey’s book, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, he highlights the importance to seek first to understand, then to be understood. In other words, you need to learn to see things from the other person’s point of view to understand why they feel as they do. Seeking real understanding affirms the other person and what they have to say. James 1:19 says “my dear brothers and sisters, take note of this; everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry”. If individuals in relationships can work through conflicts and disagreements, they will come out even stronger. Ephesians 4:29 says “do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs,that it may benefit those who listen.

  • Affection and Kindness

Individuals in healthy and happy relationships show off generous doses of kindness, appreciation, and affection to one another. These individuals are committed to accepting the other person for who they are, flaws included.  Ephesians 4:32 says “be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you”.  Expressing love and gratitude, even in simple acts and gestures, can build a sense of connection and intimacy.

  • Respect

One of the key elements behind every happy and healthy relationship is mutual respect. Individuals in a relationship are more receptive to resolving conflicts when approached in a respectful manner.  Every individual should know how to acknowledge another person’s emotional and physical boundaries and recognize the need to give each other their space. “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets”. Matthew 7:12

  • Support

In a relationship, individuals need to learn to be supportive of each other’s goals and aspirations while working together to accomplish their shared goals.  Support in a relationship could also mean sharing responsibilities fairly and not taking the other one for granted. Galatians 6:2 says “carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ”.  “And don’t forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased”.  Hebrews 13:16. Remembering to exercise common courtesy and respect at all times is vital. 

  • Commitment

Healthy and happy relationships need to be watered and nurtured. We must work together every day to make our relationships work. Colossians 3:13-14 says “bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you”.  Learning to forgive each other when you disagree and moving forward without taking revenge or harboring bitterness and resentment is essential to maintaining a healthy relationship.  Commitment requires overcoming challenges with compassion, courage, and integrity. It is said, beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.  “This is my commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you”. John 15:12.  Being attentive to your relationships means being intuitive, sensitive and aware of the people you truly love.  Doing so will go a long way to having a blessed and fruitful relationship.